Past few birthdays have been highly uneventful: dinners, ktv, drinks, overseas and minimal partying. But I think I should really do something/put in some effort for my birthday this year! I did think of flying somewhere nearby for my birthday but thanks to the lousy leave system at work which credited 3 days extra last year by mistake, I have no carryover leave which I’d need to clear by March. So I’d most likely be stuck in Singapore till my NYC trip with the girls in June. I did think of having brunch at Forlino but I’ll need to check if they have any available slots. Shall just book for 4 first and decide whether to go ahead with it when the date is nearer. I also thought of having ktv since I haven’t sang for the longest time but luckily Cheryl is back so there’d be a session soon, so I can scratch that.

Any suggestions?

Anyway, here’s a list of things I hope to get (doubt anyone will get them for me cos I don’t think anyone reads this blog but I’ll just list them down since they are stuff I want to get anyway ):
1) iMac – Was all set to get a mac mini but Dawn convinced me to get everything, but I am still procrastinating! =X
2) Boganomics & Things Bogans Like – Saw these books online and thought of reading them for a laugh but they are OOS on bookdepository and Kino, so maybe I’d pre-order or try to get them when I’m in US.
3) Semi-pro camera
4) Evening bag – Initially I wanted to get it as I don’t have any to use whenever I go for weddings but since I’ve sworn off all weddings till further notice unless it’s 1 of my close friends, I think I’ll just get a sling one that’s good for partying. But not urgent as my denim bag still works.
5) Tigers – Been wanting to get a new one as my current one is pretty old but still functioning so this is not urgent.
6) A new branded bag – Hopefully a Balenciaga that will be fulfilled when I go to NYC or Europe! A new Longchamp would be nice as well.

That’s it for now. Not too keen in makeup or skincare as thanks to the stock taking exercise done recently of my current stash, I have stopped buying any for the last half a year and got down to using up whatever I have rather than over-buying on things that I don’t need. I don’t mind new eye makeup brushes though. Of cos I’d put #7 as hot guy but that’s just being unrealistic

2) Run a marathon
Claris told me how my previous blog entry inspired her to start exercising again and asked me to join her in 1 of the 10km runs this year. I told Joce about it and she said she’s interested as well! So let’s do this! \o/

3) Write a food blog
I’ve already secured the URL I wanted. So I’ve really got to get this started!

4) Sign up for a JLPT N2 class and take JLPT N2
Let’s see how far I get for this, there’s a course in Feb that I’m highly interested in plus my ~new job will probably force me to be more proactive!

5) Get back to reading proper books!
I haven’t been reading much since I got my iphone 2+years ago, so it’s time to get back to the books as it’s been pretty obvious to me lately that my vocabulary has been deteriorating to a really horrible state!

6) Get a semi-pro camera
Try as I might to take proper photos with my Canon powershot during my NZ trip, which is already a great improvement from the normal ones I manage to take, it’s really really difficult when you compare the quality of photos with those DSLRs on the trip! Dawn recommended the Panasonic GF3 but thanks to her, I have like a million other things I want to get also! (>_<)

7) Get a boyfriend
This has been taking way too long. There is only so much friends can be there for me and it would be really nice to finally have someone to share my life with. But it’s so damn tough to find someone that’s suitable! I have to say that NZ has left me quite a changed person: the other day I actually bumped into 1 of my previous (let’s call him) “guilty pleasures” and I nearly wanted to call out to him but I stopped myself and decided to see whether he saw me first before saying hi but he did not see me and I saw him walk pass me talking on the phone happily and just thought to myself that never again was I going back to that lifestyle/bad habit. Even the so called dodgy guys in office, well I can’t seem to see them anymore and not to mention take anything they say to heart because I know that I am/can do so much better than that. It’s like I suddenly had so much more self respect. I told Aloysius this and he was like,’Finally, Nicol. I am so happy to hear that.’ But ok, I will put in more effort to meet new people in hopes of finding the one! Wish me luck!

Crazy LA trip with Pam

This was so last minute! Given that I had only known Pam 3 months before the trip, it was highly daunting when I agreed to going LA with her when she told us she had a conference there in Jan. Plus my main motivation of going was to see Tommy, which I only also just realised his existence 3 months before. What a crazy road trip it was with Pam and Rei! We learned so much about each other, ate so much glorious food, watched Hair, partied so much, met Tommy, Monte, Cassidy and saw Adam! And my crazy quest for free wifi

The girls

I’m so glad that I’ve found these girls (Mian, Pam, Claris, YC, Alyssa, Mindy + Pam’s extended bunch of friends)! I finally feel that I belong in this group of girls who are all so incredibly smart, funny and share the same values as me in so many ways. We shared our tears, fears and joy all throughout this year, mainly through drinks, glorious food (especially hooters), cooking at Pam’s house, partying and concerts. Cheers to such a wonderful year of amazingness and many more to come!

The many guys that have come and gone in my life

I’m not going to name names but those who know me well would have known how many douchebags have come and gone. But hey, even though I got so mind-fucked so many times ever so unnecessarily, I learned so much about myself and grown so much in the process of being slightly burnt.

Taiwan

I finally visited the place where many people told me they thought I would love. And sadly, due to 1 guy that came and gone in my life, this place has turned out to be one where I would not be too keen to go back to again, well at least not so soon as it is a ~dirty, dirty place. Food was 50-50 for me, loved lu rou fan, zhu you ban fan, fried chicken and bubble tea but not the weird desserts. And seriously, I thought it would be way more modern that it is! Skincare/makeup shopping from Japanese brands (particularly shu uemura) was awesome though!

Koh Samui

This was such a last minute holiday but one that was for the first time a truly relaxing one where I spent most of the time by myself and doing absolutely nothing. There was no need to plan for anything, except for airport transfer but even that was booked by my good friend, Joce. Plus her Austrian diving instructor was very cute!

Job

My first job after being back from Sydney was a mess of lack of direction, scope and support but somehow it all turned out alright. The work got done and my boss and team lead provided enough support to help us get things done. It was a breeze overall and a good start for me after being in such a shambles overseas. But there came another mad rush for me to find a new place after my contract ended. And that itself was another drama but at least I ended up with a nice increment but not with a horrific adjustment required from the new environment.

Losing weight and dressing slightly better

I was completely horrified when 1 of the guys mentioned above told me that I was tom-boyish. No one has ever told me this before in my entire life! That’s when I told myself that I had to make drastic changes. My weight was something I had to start from: the flabbiness of my tummy has been a part of me for way too long! I was lucky (ok this sounds v psycho) to fall really sick for a week plus and got the head start to really losing serious weight. This helped to shrink my appetite which I tried to maintain and started exercising way more rigorously. I cut down on carbs and ran a whole lot more. I’ve always never liked running but ever since I realised that it was the fastest and most efficient way of burning calories, that became my motivation for hanging on every time I wanted to press the stop button on the treadmill. I also grew out my hair, got a dye job, bought many dresses from ASOS and tried my best to follow Aloysius’ fashion advice. Of cos there were other so called tom-boyish attributes about me which are impossible to change like the way I talk and also the things I like, but at least visually I’m not that tom-boyish anymore!

Partying

Thanks to my awesome friend, Mian, I got to party so much for free!

New Zealand Contiki

I’ve always wanted to join Contiki when I was younger but never got around doing it as it felt really expensive. But when I learned that I had 20 days to clear for my carried over leave from my previous contract and new contract, I chanced upon Contiki as they didn’t require the usual minimum 2 to go clause which most tours had. Initially I wanted to do the Simply Italy tour since it fitted my schedule of numerous weddings to attend in December but after Pam and gang psychoed me to go New Zealand since Italy would be too cold and I was quite on board after looking at the NZ scenery photos, plus they had a nice slot immediately after Xiaomin’s wedding, I jumped at it. And boy, was I in for such a ride! I had already planned to go by myself but during 1 of the S09 JC gatherings, I happened to tell the gang that I was going on the tour and HJ said she also had leave to clear and can join me! So I wasn’t alone. But never would I know how much this trip would change me. Since everyone was so young and adventurous, I saw myself being lured into doing things that I’ve never done before. Like playing table tennis (seriously at the moment when Ty told me to give it a go, the usual me would be like no way! but at that moment, I just felt that I’m overseas with a bunch of strangers who don’t know me and probably won’t ever see me again, so WHAT THE HECK!), sky diving, canyon swing, white water rafting, black water rafting, skulling half a glass of volka neat, etc. And “how good is it” (taken from Mark) that we were so lucky to be in such an amazing group with people who were nice, considerate and good looking! It could easily have been a bunch of weirdo rapists and would have been such an annoyance to spend over 2 weeks with! We have all gotten so close, I can see most of us as lifelong friends and I do hope that we can do a reunion trip 2 years later in Thailand or something.

Mark

I never thought I’d ever meet such a wonderful person in my life: smart, street-smart, absolutely can talk to anyone, observant, nice, Mr. fix-it, confident, tall, hot, muscular, white with green eyes and only 22 years old! I never knew I could push myself so much to get what I wanted! In so many ways, he has taught me so many things and opened up my eyes to what it should be like to be with someone so amazing that never puts you down just for his convenience or embarrass you.  I will never forget how he always came and spoke to me (what good chats we had!), made so much eye contact every time and how we just knew how to get each other psyched up. He will forever and always remain a special person in my heart. Such a perfect memory!

Was there for a lunch with the usual gang and a waiter told me to sit inner as he had to walk pass behind me to serve the other table behind me, so I shifted. After he got out, I was thinking, ok I can move my seat out since I didn’t like to be squeezed into my seat. Next he came again and pushed my seat in from behind me to move past behind me and I was like, WTF!? I moved out again and as he was walking out behind me he pushed me back in again! And he said to me that he had to serve the customer so can I shift to the empty seat across me and I raised my voice and was like, CAN YOU DON’T BE SO RUDE ABOUT IT!? And he started denying it, saying he had to serve the customer as if I was being unreasonable about it. At this point I was fuming. His manager or head server came to talk to me and I was like, hey I don’t like being pushed into my seat and I don’t see him pushing the seat of the guy sitting behind me. And at this point the waiter started shouting all the way from 1 table across me that he already said that he was sorry what more did I want in a very annoyed tone and I was like, WHAT KIND OF ATTITUDE IS THIS!? His manager told him to stop talking and walk away.

So anyway, his manager gave us a free round of drinks but seriously WTF!? The food was fabulous but with such bad service, it really pains me to decide that I will never ever want to patronize this restaurant ever again.

Buono Pizza Bar & Italian Restaurant (Lichfield road) – Monday $1 oysters – must book tho

Mortons martini happy hour with free flow steak sandwiches (mon-fri including public hols, 5-7pm but must start queuing at 430)

Oosh (dempsey) is pretty good for western food as well

TGIF (heeren) has super strong drinks esp their cotton candy martini and magaritas *yum*

Black cafe (chevron house) has super nice hazelnut affogato

Ippudo (mandarin gallery) has ramen with super cheap happy hr drinks ($6 before 7pm i think) at mandarin gallery

Bakez & Blenz (china square) is the fruit juice shop that has super nice waffles

there r other small places which have super nice food: pork knuckles at sempang bedok hawker centre, famous wantan mee at kitchener road, oyster cake at kitchener road but i don’t have the exact addresses, just know how to go…

You see, I just got my first pay in the new job and now I feel so nice that I’m finally getting some real money in after quite some time. Even though everyday I feel so whiny about the job due to its lack of structure, my cluelessness about what is going on and lack of sense of belonging with the new work environment, at least I have some cash to spend now. And it’s so terrible that there seems to be quite a few things I’m eying right now. Like that ALF membership and calendar. I succumb easily to pretty things and peer pressure. I just got the Kinokuniya membership card a few days ago because I had quite a few things to buy and there was a 20% off for members till this weekend so I thought what the heck, I’ve been resisting getting the membership card since they started this membership programme which is forever, so just get it now since I usually spend a shitload on emooks and chinese/japanese pictorials and while I’m at that, just get the longest membership (3 years) since that will be about $1+/month. It’s sometimes bad when I think of the price of things in terms of a per month or per year basis, because then it appears cheap to me. I blame this on my friend who put this “logic” in my mind a few years ago. Other than these relatively small ticket items, I’m thinking of getting some stuff from the US since the dollar is very low right now. Not exactly sure of what yet because I haven’t taken the time to check online, but maybe some makeup or clothes, though no sense of urgency in that at all. Getting anything branded is not really on my priority now because I’ve kind of grown out of that phase, though a Prada or Loewe is awesome to have but I’m not really that into going into the shops or websites to check them out anymore. I’m just more keen in getting things that suit me personally instead of stuff that anyone on the street is carrying or wearing, like getting some nice strappy sandals and shorts.

So anyway back to the feeling of laziness, I think I have way too many shows and things to keep track of. I spent most of the weekend trying to catch up on loads of the AL videos that I missed in the earlier part of the year. It’s weird thinking back because I had relatively a lot of free time back then but totally did not bother about all this. I guess I was really too preoccupied with other priorities.

I actually have a weekend KL trip a week before Christmas which I feel like backing out of because of this laziness of roughing it out in KL since it’s not exactly going to be a relaxing trip. But maybe I’m just over thinking how bad it will be. And it is a little daunting because I don’t know most of the people that are going and since I take quite a while to warm up to people, I might appear to be really quiet and living in my own world for most of the trip. And I can’t really phantom the idea of being off Twitter for a weekend! Let’s see how things go.

I’d just like to leave with a parting thought from one of the AL VH1 videos which I saw yesterday that left a very strong impression. 1 fan asked him where he got his confidence from and he explained that to be in a confidence place, you have to first accept everything about yourself, even the bad along with the good. Acceptance is the key. Which really made sense to me because I guess once you did that, nothing can really frazzle you out anymore and you are free from any kind of insecurity to do whatever you want to achieve your goals. I’m still working towards that.

Scroll to 2:32 for this part.

I wasn’t even particularly excited about it due to trying to settle my own issues these past few weeks until she called me 2 days before saying that she won tickets to the meet and greet for Daughtry and Adam and asked me along that got me really pumped up about the whole day. So anyway, we got to Swissotel and met up with the Sony person who presented us with the VIP wrist tags and prizes.

The meeting with Daughtry was really rushed, it was like 2 seconds for each member where we shook their hands and took a group photo. I was wearing my killer queen T-shirt which I thought was cool but it only struck me as being kinda brilliant when I heard Chris starting to sing Killer Queen when I walked into the room. So some free tunes from Chris. It was a little awkward for our group since most of us weren’t fans and didn’t know the band well. I guess I’m possibly the only 1 who knew Daughtry well since I really loved Chris since his AI days and went for their showcase at St James when they first came to Singapore a few years back, but I’m embarrassed to say that I haven’t gotten any of their albums before even though I know all their songs.

Meeting with Adam was however a different story. I really could feel so excited and nervous at the same time while waiting for the Sony person to bring us in. When he did finally arrive, I was just astounded. Since I was first in line, he told me that he liked my shirt and asked me what my name was. I was really shocked by how friendly and nice he was. And how gorgeous his eyes were The session was still quick but we had more time with him since he made a point to talk to everyone there and get to know each of us a little better. And of course we all got a hug from him

Since Terra wasn’t able to find any buyers for the 2 extra F1 passes she had won and was willing to sell off at a huge discount, I called up Yihua, who became 1 of my good friends that I still keep in touch with from secondary school due to all the idol discussions that we had for so many years. I knew that he wanted to go but couldn’t because the tickets were a little too steep for him. So he popped by, all decked up in his Adam T-shirt that he got when he went for the finale show last year in LA.

Anyway we rushed to see Daughtry after having some food and were running like mad once we heard the music starting when we reached the F1 grounds. Their set was amazing, covering all my favourite songs like It’s not over, Over you, No surprises, Ghost of me, September (I think they also did Crash but I can’t remember =X ) and ending off with Home. I really enjoyed singing along and my voice was really hoarse after the short 45 minute set. My only complaint was that they did not do What about now. And I finally knew who was who in the band since I met them earlier in the morning haha.

After that we sat around with the group of girls that Terra knew from Twitter, just chatting around with each other. Yihua was game enough to get some eye makeover from Pam and many girls took photos of the whole process.

Just absolute fun hanging around with like minded people, few of us were just sitting there and talking about our musical interests and what our first concerts were. At about 10pm the gates to the fan area opened and it was a crazy rush! I really never expected things to be so crazy, I just remembered hearing some commotion in front and people started standing up. 1 guy in our group started calling his friends, saying, ‘Come back NOWWWWWWW!!!!!’ And the queue started moving in quite fast, all of us were raising up our hands with the wristbands so that security could easily check and let people through and once we got through, we ran like mad to the nearest spot to the stage. Space around me started filling up with people and it got uncomfortable. Like really uncomfortable. It was really warm and squeezy, I was sure that I would faint or wet my pants since there was no way I could go to the toilet now. I remember whining really badly to Terra, I’m so grateful that she didn’t slap me silly for being such a whiny ass bitch. She even helped to fan me when a lady started squeezing in front of me leaving me no space to fan myself. I kept thinking to myself that I’m never going to get through the next 1.5hours of waiting for him to start and even contemplated on leaving halfway of his concert if I felt like fainting from all the stuffiness. I also kept thinking maybe I was just too old for all this fandom.

But all was worth it once he came blasting out with Voodoo and Down the Rabbit Hole in his purple jacket and top hat. I still have DTRH ringing in my ears: it’s basically imprinted in my mind now. I did give out an urgh face to Terra when he started singing Ring of Fire as it was my least favourite song from his AI run. The image of the fiery screensaver background when he sang it during AI comes to my mind whenever I hear him sing it. Sorry! Fever was great. I really loved how well Adam could move/dance, never compromising on his vocals and I thought his kiss with Tommy was really sweet Sleepwalker was probably my favourite song out of the entire set as he really did some cool improvisations on the melody which I thought sounded so good. Next he moved on to the acoustic part of the concert with Whataya Want From Me, Soaked and Aftermath. I remembered very clearly that the people around me were really stunned by Soaked. Everyone just stood rooted to their positions and staring at him. I don’t particularly remember a lot of people taking videos or pictures but just hanging on to every word that he sang and being in awe. That was a great moment of the concert for me as well because the silence in the audience was just deafening and you just get to listen to his flawless voice. Then Adam went for a change of costumes while the band entertained us with the Erotica Interlude. He then continued on with Sure Fire Winners, Strut and Music Again. Everyone was feeling very high already but then he got on to what he called the entire message he wanted to bring across, which was LOVE with If I Had You. I really started to relate to the lyrics very well:

But if I had you, that would be the only thing I’d ever need
Yeah if I had you, then money fame and fortune never could compete
If I had you, life would be a party it’d be ecstasy

It all made sense to me that you just need to be with your loved ones and nothing else would match up to that. It brought the song to a whole new level to me. He took the time also during the song to introduce his band and dancers. The crowd was going wild shouting for more after he left the stage and I guess after about 5 minutes of our chanting he came out again with an encore of Mad World, an arrangement which I have not heard before so I couldn’t say that I really liked it very much as compared the chilling version he did on AI. But I guess it was suitable since it’d be so weird if he really did the chilling version as an encore. Anyway he said his goodbyes and that was it. Everyone was feeling great after the show. I was so glad that I survived the entire concert without fainting or leaving halfway. I had really forgotten about all the uncomfy-ness before the concert and it was all worth it. Yihua was feeling really crazy, singing along to the songs. He even asked me, ‘Are you thinking what I’m thinking B1?’ To which I replied, ‘I think I am, B2! I think you’re CRAZY!’ hahaha. We got ourselves some drinks after that before parting to go home or, in Yihua’s case, clubbing. I was going through the photos I took with Terra on the way home and also checking out Twitter, realising that I had so many new followers.

I finally got home at 3am but only got to sleep like 1 hour later as I was just feeling so high about the concert and my photos, I felt like I finally took some decent concert photos as compared to my other attempts in previous concerts. I woke up giddy at around 7+am and scanned through my photos but most were still quite blur or maybe I’m just super critical considering the super clear ones that I’ve seen online. But it was great fun trying to capture the moment myself Here are some of the best ones. The bearable ones are on my facebook.

I absolutely adore this photo that Yihua’s friend, Wei Long took.

It’s the defining photo that got me all fan girly about Tommy. I felt like a total n00b from all the related stuff that people have been tweeting for me to see. I finally understood what all this twitter craziness was all about when I started following more people who gave constant updates on photos/videos of Adam and Tommy. Had I caught on the craze last year I think I would have made full use of the time when they came to Singapore and maybe go to the other legs of the international tour with other friends. But well, I guess I was too caught up with my own issues and it’s not possible to actually go for any of them now since I just started on my new job and am not a spontaneous last minute kinda person.

The last few days got me wanting more out of this entire experience by looking up all the related media and following up on the upcoming concerts. I’ve also kind of decided that I’d probably make my vacations more worthwhile by planning them properly such that I get to go to concerts as well. I don’t know how feasible it is for me to make a resolution to go to an Adam concert every year but I’m really trying to work towards that.

I got 2 mailers today that pleased me: a free tote which I can collect next week due to being the 1st 5K cardmembers to spend $1K during the month of June using UOB Lady’s Card and an invite to a Banana Republic event showcasing their new work clothes range for the fall and it includes $20 to be spent on the event itself. What nice timing! Since I’ve been pondering about updating my wardrobe lately, even though I think I have sufficient work clothes but no harm going down to check it out and there are free cocktails and canapes. Some point during my events job, I did think I should try to go down for more fashion events and familiarize myself with how they were ran. So maybe here’s my chance to get some fashion event experience!

I met kf today for lunch at Miharu and the ramen were exceptionally more salty than the last time I went… Anyway we were so hungry that we gobbled down the food before I even remember taking a photo of them. Which many people told me lately that it seems like I’ve been eating a lot of food. But I still feel quite alright and I really control a lot! I stopped myself from ordering ice cream or cakes when we went to Canele after that and just got an Ice Apple Tea instead because I didn’t want that overkill feeling. It was also later that I realized that dieting is really more about self control to stop yourself from continuing to eat, note that there is nothing there that talks about whether you feel full or not. Because overeating is not about feeling full or not but rather you just feel or want to continue eating and not concerned about whether you are full or not. I think that’s the only way for me since I don’t exercise at all since a very long time ago except walking.

Anyway, for the past 2 days I’ve been corresponding a lot with a certain new guy, he even asked me whether I wanted to meet for coffee later but I told him I didn’t feel like going out anymore since I’ve been out the whole day. I do love ‘chatting’ with him, he really reminds me a little bit of my old best friend. For one thing, they do share the same birthdate. But I’m just not ready to meet up with anyone just this moment, it’s just all a little too awkward. And lately, I realized I really love hanging out with Aries guys. They are just so sure of what they want and give good advice as well.

I also got informed to go for a reasoning test for 1 of the positions that I applied quite a few weeks ago. I really feel like saying ‘mua ha ha’ because it seems like the market is damn good now? I never got any response from that company before! But I am quite bent on my decision already, majorly because I finally get to work in town. Gonna be an amazing feeling because the atmosphere in Raffles Place area is really much more vibrant than anywhere else. You feel an energy because everyone there is just much more professional. I really need to start updating my wardrobe. Lately I just feel that my clothes are so not appealing. Too many cotton stuff that just makes me look like a kid. And also my hair Really need to grow them out because I can’t stand how I look anymore. Short hair needs to be styled no matter what. I cannot just cut my hair and expect them to be in place and look nice without doing anything anymore. So solution is to grow my hair out so that I don’t need to do so much to them. Especially my fringe. I am never going to cut them myself ever again. I am still living with the horror when I tried few weeks back.

Anyway, I’m feeling glad that things have been getting better and better these past few weeks. My confidence has increased also from going to so many interviews. I can safely say that I am very comfortable talking to strangers now. I’m like a professional interview goer man. Really made me learn a lot from all these interviews. 1 important thing that I always tell myself when I go for these interviews is that I am not an idiot so people should want to hire me. That is one thing that I am so clear about because I really am not. I know because I have experienced real idiots from my previous jobs especially the events one. So that is clear as day for me. I can sound not so confident if you test my technical knowledge but I know that I am hirable because I am not an idiot.

I just feel that if only I have dates now with someone new and eligible then I’d be living my dream life